Mental/Emotional Healing
How I Harmed Myself Until I Heard My Soul
The Journey from Self-Harm to Self-Return Through Soul Healing.
- The Unspoken Language of Pain
Self-harm is a language. It is a desperate, silent scream from a part of the soul that does not know how else to be heard. For years, my body became the canvas for a pain my voice could not articulate. Each scar was a word, each act a sentence in a story of profound inner turmoil, disconnection, and a deep-seated belief that I was unworthy of love or peace.
This scroll is not a confession, but a testimony. It is the story of how I journeyed into the deepest shadows of self-inflicted pain and emerged, not unscathed, but whole. It is an offering to anyone who has ever used their own body to quiet the storm inside, and a map back to the sound of your own soul.
- Learning to Hear the Soul's Voice
The turning point did not come from a place of strength, but from exhaustion. It came when the act of harming myself became more tiring than the act of living. It was in that quiet surrender that I first heard it: a whisper beneath the rage and the pain. It was the voice of my soul.
It did not condemn. It did not judge. It simply said, “I am here. I have been waiting.”
Healing began when I chose to listen to that voice. It meant turning inward instead of outward. It meant learning to sit with the discomfort, to hold the pain instead of expelling it onto my skin. It was the hardest and most sacred work of my life.
“The soul does not speak in condemnation. It speaks in invitations. It invites you to come home to yourself.”
- The Journey of Self-Return
Self-return is not about erasing the past, but integrating it. It’s about honoring the part of you that used self-harm to survive. Here are the steps that guided my journey:
- Witnessing Without Judgment: I learned to look at my scars not with shame, but with a historian’s curiosity. What was this scar trying to say? What pain was it holding? I began to listen to the stories my body told.
- Finding Alternative Languages: My soul needed to speak, so I gave it other ways. I wrote poetry. I screamed into pillows. I danced with abandon. I painted my pain onto canvases instead of my skin. I gave the pain a voice that was not destructive.
- The Ritual of Loving Touch: I began a daily practice of placing my hands on the parts of my body I had harmed. I sent them love, gratitude, and apology. I was re-patterning my body’s memory from pain to love.
- Soul Retrieval: Through guided meditation and ritual, I called back the fragmented pieces of myself that had been lost to trauma and pain. I welcomed them home, assuring them they were safe now.
A Sacred Promise
If you are in this place of hurting, know that your soul has not abandoned you. It is there, beneath the noise, waiting for you to listen. Your pain is not your identity; it is a messenger. Listen to its message, and you will find the path back to the unwavering love that is your truest nature.